#A NEW SEASON
★ Summer 2019 is the first summer for years I can genuinely enjoy.
I CAN ENJOY THE SUN AGAIN!
I CAN DO SPORTS!
Furthermore, I can do sports again – like cycling and running. Even on a regular basis. That’s an incredible and sometimes hard to believe improvement for me!
I FEEL ALMOST NORMAL!
Today I can do things I only could dream of during the past years.
On some days, I feel almost normal!
The weird thing is that I have to get used to feeling normal.
Can you imagine?
I’ve got so used to being sick and trapped within a weak body that feeling good and vital is a state I have to get used to yet.
So it happens that I have to stop for a moment to check if I am awake or if I am dreaming.
I AM ENTERING A NEW CHAPTER
It feels as if I have finally passed a long, unpleasant, and dark period of my life – like a gloomy and rainy fall followed by an endless as well as dark winter.
I LOST MY LEAVES
I have lost my leaves like a tree in fall – bit by bit I lost my old life.
Every layer of my old identity, like my job or social contacts, vanished gradually.
And in the end, only the core of my identity remained.
Everything I used to define myself by was gone. Just me was left in the basket. But who is that ‘me’ then?
I FEEL INTO HIBERNATION
It feels like I had fallen into a long, deep winter sleep. I hibernated as long as my body needed to heal, and my heart to know who I am after all.
But my winter eventually came to an end.
Even better: my spring has already begun!
I am growing and prospering again – like nature when the days become longer after the winter solstice, and the sunbeams are melting the snow so that the plants can start a new cycle of life.
I AM RISING AGAIN
I am right in the middle of my springtime that is mainly about self-discovery.
Quite a roller coaster ride – I can tell you!
I have a vague idea about who that Nadine actually is by now. And it actually doesn’t matter that I haven’t found myself yet.
What matters is the following: I have gained as much physical health back as I need to search for myself while keep healing.
FINALLY, I AM GOING TO FLY AGAIN
I am already excited about the next step and chapter – my upcoming summer.
Whenever it may occur and whatever it will hold for me – I am ready.
What season are you experiencing personally right now? Spring, summer, fall, or winter? ★
“What appears to be the end,
may really be a new beginning.”